It’s been a while since I last posted, and today I felt like doing something different. This is an idea I’ve been kicking around for a while but I haven’t written anything about it yet because… I don’t really know why. I just haven’t. But, here it is now. This is a bit of a departure for me in that it has nothing whatsoever to do with movies or zombies or Bruce Willis or Batman or any of those kinds of things, but I still had fun writing it.
Sometimes, the crap people do is so ridiculous and confusing and stupid that it just boggles the mind. How many times have you seen someone do something or maybe read about something someone did in the newspaper that is so incomprehensibly stupid that you think to yourself, “Who in their right minds could ever think that was a good idea? In what universe is that a smart thing to do?” These kinds of Incomprehensible Human Behaviors, or IHB as I like to call them, are what I aim to explore here.
The sad thing is that there are potentially an infinite number of stupid incomprehensible things human beings do on a daily basis. The good news for me is, lots of material to write about, heheh.
The first, and perhaps one of the most frequent, examples of IHB is bad drivers. There are so many stupid things that people do on the road it sometimes makes you wonder if all the other drivers have spontaneously forgotten how to drive, or if they ever knew in the first place.
When I was in Driver’s Ed, I remember one time I was out driving with the instructor and I had to make a left turn. There was another car behind me at the time, and when the light turned green the car behind me made a super sharp left turn and cut right in front of me. I get that people don’t necessarily want to be stuck behind student drivers, that’s kind of understandable (my apologies to all the student drivers out there) but doing something like that is just plain stupid. Besides, most student drivers are probably already nervous enough (I know I was) without people pulling unpredictable and potentially dangerous crap like that. I mean, would getting stuck behind a student driver for a couple miles make that much of a difference for you to be able to get where you’re going? No, of course it wouldn’t.
Or how about when you’re driving down the freeway and you need to change lanes, so you take a quick look to see if the lane is open. It is, and there’s only one car in the lane which is a fair distance behind you. So you put on your signal and start to ease over into the lane, when you notice that guy behind you start to speed up dramatically. You’re already halfway into the lane so you go ahead and go the rest of the way, but that guy who was a decent distance behind you is now right on top of you, making frustrated gestures as if you are somehow responsible for inconveniencing him! Geez, dude, you were plenty far behind me when I started getting over, but you sped the hell up to try to get in front of me for no reason at all, and then you act like I did something wrong? Incomprehensible.
Or think about those idiots who realize they’re in the wrong turn lane, so instead of doing the logical thing, which would be to just turn in whatever direction they’re in the lane for and loop back around, decide to angle their car in completely the opposite direction to try to turn the other way, blocking all the other lanes for people who are actually going the right freaking direction? Incomprehensible.
And it always seems like people are in such a damn hurry all the time. People run red lights just because they’re too lazy to stop and wait for the light to change. Will it really make that much of a difference in your life if you get to where you’re going two minutes later than you otherwise would have? In most cases, probably not. I’d understand if there’s a life-threatening emergency or something, but 9.5 times out of 10 people are just so self-absorbed they run the red lights anyway, because to hell with everyone else. And when you’re zipping through red lights when other drivers are just starting to move once their lights turn green, you’re potentially putting other people in danger just because you can’t be bothered to give a crap. That level of sheer self-absorption is something I simply cannot fathom. Incomprehensible really is the only word for it.
Hell, I drive 65 miles an hour on the freeway and I get passed by freaking SEMI TRUCKS doing seventy. The world seems to have forgotten how to take its time with anything.
There are so many examples of IHB on the road that I could make a continuing series just talking about Incomprehensible Human Driving Behaviors, but for the sake of diversity I’m going to try to mix it up a bit with later installments of this series. For example, Incomprehensible Human Internet Behavior, or Incomprehensible Human Social Behavior. The possibilities are, sadly, endless.
Now if you’ll excuse me, I’ve got an incomprehensible behavior to observe.